If you live in Maryland long enough, you earn the right to complain about it. Loudly. Passionately. Repeatedly. And yet—despite all the eye rolls and dramatic sighs—most of us aren’t going anywhere.

So here it is: the list of things I hate about Maryland… which are actually the reasons people fall in love with it, buy homes here, raise families here, and defend it like it’s a sibling.

1. The Weather Can’t Commit to a Single Mood

Maryland weather is chaos. You can experience winter, spring, and summer in the same week—and somehow be dressed wrong for all of it. Snow one day, shorts the next, humidity always lurking.

But here’s the annoying truth: we get real seasons. Fall actually looks like fall. Spring shows up with cherry blossoms and patio weather. Summer brings beach weekends and long nights. Winter reminds you to slow down—briefly. It keeps life interesting, even if your wardrobe never quite knows what’s coming.

2. The Maryland Flag Is… Everywhere

Cars. Socks. Tattoos. Shorts. Homes. Dogs. Flags on flags on flags. You can’t escape it.

And yes, it’s a lot. But also? It’s iconic. Instantly recognizable. And the level of pride Marylanders have in a state flag is borderline unhinged—in the best way. That flag is basically a personality trait, and if you know, you know.

3. Everyone Thinks Their Part of Maryland Is the Best Part

Baltimore vs. the counties. City neighborhoods arguing with other city neighborhoods. Waterfront people vs. walkable people. “North of the city” energy vs. “south of the bridge” vibes.

It’s exhausting. But it’s also because Maryland has an insane amount of variety packed into a small state. You can find your version of “perfect”—and argue about it forever.

4. Traffic Is Basically a Lifestyle Choice

Yes, traffic can be rough. But the reason? Marylanders commute to everything. Major cities. Government hubs. Waterfront towns. Suburbs. Rural escapes. You can realistically live near water, parks, nightlife, or farmland—and still access jobs and culture within a reasonable drive.

That kind of flexibility is rare, even if it comes with brake lights.

5. You Can’t Go Anywhere Without Seeing Someone You Know

The grocery store? Your old coworker. Open house? Your friend’s cousin. Brewery? Someone you went to high school with.

It feels invasive—until you realize it means community actually exists here. Maryland feels big on paper, but small in practice. And once you’re part of it, you’re in.

6. The Food Scene Ruins Other Cities for You

Crab cakes that make you judgmental. Old Bay on things it has no business being on. Hole-in-the-wall spots that outperform big-name restaurants. Neighborhood bars with cult followings.

Maryland food culture is strong, emotional, and deeply defended. Once you get used to it, everywhere else feels… under-seasoned.

7. Marylanders Are Aggressively Defensive About Maryland

Say something mildly critical and suddenly everyone becomes a historian, economist, and food critic.

But that defensiveness comes from pride—and from living in a place that outsiders often misunderstand. Maryland doesn’t need hype; it grows on you. And once it does, you’re loyal for life.

8. You’re Never Really “Stuck” Here

Beach? Mountains? Major cities? Quiet towns? Festivals? Sports? History? Nature? All within reach.

Maryland refuses to trap you in one lifestyle. You can change phases of life without changing states. That flexibility is underrated—and a huge reason people stay long-term.

9. The Cost of Living Forces You to Be Intentional

Is Maryland cheap? No. But is it worth it? For many people, yes.

The cost reflects access—to jobs, healthcare, education, culture, and opportunity. It encourages smarter planning, better long-term decisions, and often, building real equity instead of bouncing from place to place.

10. You’ll Complain Forever… and Still Defend It Relentlessly

Maryland is the place you roast endlessly but protect fiercely. You can criticize it—but heaven help anyone else who tries.

That’s how you know it’s home.

The Bottom Line

Maryland isn’t perfect. It’s loud, opinionated, unpredictable, and full of strong personalities. But it’s also diverse, connected, culturally rich, and deeply livable.

You might say you hate it—but chances are, you’re not leaving. And honestly? Neither are we.